Detachment in the Real World and The Monastery
Below is part of a newsletter that I receive weekly from a monk at a Monastery in New Mexico. The name of the monastery is, “Christ in the Desert.” I make an annual retreat there every year.
It’s very secluded—at the end of a thirteen mile dirt road. It was built in the 60’s by George Nakashima, famous Japanese-American woodworker and architect. The Monastery is “off the grid” and the adobe construction blends perfectly with the cactus and the high canyon walls that surround it. Cloistered together there are about twenty-five monks and rooms for another ten or so guests.
Abbot Philip’s message this week addresses the challenge of dealing with difficult people in our lives—people we cannot trust. Below is a portion of that newsletter. I think his words help us (family members) know how to best deal with someone in our lives who has shown (often over weeks, months and even years) that they cannot be trusted. I guess that even among the monks “every day is not a hot fudge sundae.”
THE PRACTICALITY OF CUTTING SOMEONE OUT OF ONE’S LIFE (AT LEAST FOR A TIME).
~ Excerpt from Abbot Philip’s newsletter
“. . . In the long-run, whatever we do—presuming that we allow such a person to remain in our lives—is going to require huge amounts of energy from us, so we must be prepared for that, if we choose to continue to relate to the person. READ MORE . . . (and to see photos of Christ in the Desert Monastery)
To read more on the subject of detachment, read Joe’s very popular article “Detachment. How Can I?“
* Have you “tried everything?” To learn about phone counseling with Joe Herzanek click here.
** Detachment–Letting Go of Someone Else’s Problem
Detachment is Hard–Radio interview with Joe Herzanek
Codependent, WHY do we continue to rescue?
> Family help for METH addiction
Answers for families facing addiction for the first time!
Yes, meth addicts DO recover and families can and do get better.
Read more about detachment with love:
Why Don’t They Just Quit? Hope for families struggling with addiction.
~By Joe Herzanek
As the mom of a child struggling with addiction, and the author of ‘The Joey Song: A Mother’s Story of Her Son’s Addiction,’ my ‘go to’ book is still “Why Don’t They Just Quit? ~Sandy Swenson
Best book ever about addiction. Written by one whose done it and is recovering. Easy to read, not preachy, just honest. I recommend this book to anyone with an addict in their life! ~Lynda A
Got an addiction problem in your family? Read this book. Joe knows his stuff. This book helps you to better understand those who are dealing with friends and family that are addicted to drugs and alcohol. I have read several of these books but this one is the best. ~RJ
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